Thursday, February 17, 2011

Bruce's


There are a few things in this world that I can genuinely say I know a lot about.

1) Dance
2) Books
3) Fitness
4) Reality TV
5) Sprinkle cookies

Now, before you judge me, you must realize that the books cancel out the reality TV and the fitness cancels out the sprinkle cookies.  Whatever.  Anyway, a few days ago, I accidentally ran into what is, in my expert opinion, the best sprinkle cookie in New York City.  By far.  You must go try.

Here's the skinny.  I had an audition on 15th and 10th and then had to run by my agent's office on 21st and Park.  If you're a savvy New Yorker, you know that there is no good way to get between the two locations without taking a cab.  I'm allergic to cabs.  And, incidentally, I'm also allergic to the smooshy sofas and chairs in Starbucks and other coffee shops that inevitably have or have had bed bugs.  But, I digress.  I decided to take a stroll between my two locations to avoid spending money to sit in someone else's dried vomit while inhaling the three-days-without-a-shower stench of a turban-wearing English-as-a-fifteenth-language cab driver.

So, I trudged.  In my snow boots.  It wasn't so bad, but by the time I had traversed four avenues, I was starting to get grumpy.  Lo and behold, in the depths of my despair, on the corner of 16th and 6th, I spied a shimmering oasis of butter and sugar.  Bruce's Bakery.  Now, I didn't know Bruce's from any other bakery.  I was just cold and grumpy and I wanted to smell some baked goodness, so I headed in under the guise that I would purchase a cup of coffee.  No.  Not so much.  They had sprinkle cookies.  My favorite thing in the world . . . besides chocolate martinis.  And I had to continue my research, right?  I mean, if I didn't have a sprinkle cookie here, my list of the best sprinkle cookies in New York would be incomplete, and, thus, incorrect, right?  Right.

I decided to look around and ask a few questions.  Apparently, Bruce's is the "Bakery to the stars", has been around since 1970, and sports a wall of photos of celebrities in the store including Jay Leno, Cindy Crawford, Tom Cruise, and Howard Stern.  So, there were stars in the joint.  Okay.  Nice for the tourists, but I didn't care so much about that.  I wanted my sprinkle cookie.  I peered behind the counter at the loaves of challah and wheat bread and spied next to it a sign saying that the establishment is kosher.  Who knew?  Not that I'm kosher, but it's always good to know these things.  In addition, Bruce (obviously, the owner) had recently issued an invitation to "throwdown" with anyone on the Food Network's show, "Cupcake Wars".  This guy is obviously very serious.  As my cookie was being rung up, I inquired as to where Bruce's gets their bread.  The woman in horn-rimmed glasses behind the counter looked deeply insulted and replied, "We make it ourself.  Daily".  Well, excuuuusse me!  I just wanted a cookie and here I have stumbled into a full-out kosher full-service bakery that caters to the stars of New York.  Classic.

I paid, took my extremely large cookie and one last look around, and headed out to slush through another mile or so of black snow-ooze.  Now, though, I had my baked good to keep me company.  First bite.  Different!  It was significantly heavier on the vanilla flavoring than your average cookie.  And . . . was that fresh lemon zest?  The cookie crumbled in my mouth into a delicious conglomeration of butter, sugar, sprinkles, and . . . pure yum.  The rest of the walk went by in a blur.  I didn't even feel the cold.  Yes, folks.  I had found the best sprinkle cookie in the New York metropolitan area.  Let it be known.  Let the bells chime out.  Best sprinkle cookie ever.  Now, I'm going to the gym.  Peace.

1 comment:

Hiatt's blog said...

Nice. Very funny! I used to eat like a sugar brick a day in college (although I prefer my sugar bricks without sprinkles).